In Everything Give Thanks

I've been in circumstances lately that have more than challenging. I'm the type of person who is moved by music and can quickly become encouraged by listening to Christian songs. I've been directed back to songs that are blasts from the past like Harvest's "Only the Overcomers" and "Stand". If you've never heard them you can listen to them at YouTube. Some of the early contemporary Christian music was so awesome and inspiring. Perhaps a little more appreciated by me – since at one point in my life I felt like I had "lost" the joy of music forever - but that's another story.

And these songs did minister to me - some. However, the "fix" was temporary because, in the current situation I'm in, the roots are deep and the attack is strong. I'm on the front lines and the artillery is aimed right between my eyes. Of course I have prayed. During this situation, I have found that I can pray for others, but it feels like my discussions with the Lord about me have a one way ticket – to the ceiling and down. I know that isn't true, but it appears that I've got a touch of "hard-of-hearing-it is". Perhaps it is because I really don't want to hear anything about what I'm going through and only want to hear about the next step after the war.

So in the midst of the raging battle I "saw" this – not an actual vision – but I could picture this: I was standing in a glass house and I turned my head to the right and saw a myriad of people whose lives appeared enviable. I then turned my head to the left and I could see people who had major struggles going on in their lives. The message appeared to be that I didn't need to look at either of the groups. I couldn't say, "Thank God I'm not in that group – or Lord why can't I be more like the people in that group?" We aren't given the option to compare ourselves one to another. So the question remained – could I be thankful and worship God in my own house?

That's when I fell into a trap. (another – again – ugh) I thought about the wonderful little "faith-isms" we say to one another – like – "Thank God for what you are going through – when you come out on the other side you will be stronger." While that may be true – whilst you are going through the gauntlet, it is NOT a really comforting message. How about the – well let's start going through all I have to be thankful for – and I grant you that while that very often works – it too was not doing it for me at the moment. I just wasn't needing a "what you do for me" time.

Many years ago we were asked if we were interested in adopting two little boys. These children were in a bad situation and needed a home quickly. We had wanted children for so long that this seemed an answer sent by God – not one child but two and it was right around Christmas. I walked through the mall looking at toys and dreaming about what the soon coming Christmas might be like with two boys of my own. Of course we told our friends and family, and all were praying with us and for us. And then the phone call came. A distant relative of the boys said she would take the children. Within minutes my hopes and dreams were dashed to nothing. My heart felt like someone had ripped it out of my chest.

I jumped in my car to head over to a friend's house for consolation. I cried and hyperventilated all the way over to her house. When I got there – no one was home. I got back in the car, rolled the window up and screamed at the top of my lungs. Then I cried. I cried until I was worn out. And then I said this,

"Satan you may try to take everything away from me – but this you cannot take - God is still God. Jesus Christ is still my Lord. Holy Spirit still lives within me. You have not won. You will not win. If I get down to nothing else in my life – this I know to be true – Jesus Christ died for my sins and He is my Lord and Savior."

When I get down to the nitty – gritty. When I am "at the bottom of the barrel" - in my life it doesn't come down to what I have, what I've been given, what battles I've won.  The bottom line is who He is – and that NEVER changes. I was back to that point the other day and discovered (again) that I am full of thanks that God is faithful. He is who He says He is – regardless of what is going on (or not going on) in my life. My life, my works, my husband, my child, my work (or lack thereof), my possessions – or the loss of any or all of those – nothing alters the truth of God and His Word. That's what I stand on in the midst of any circumstance. Thank you God for You.

I've been in circumstances lately that have more than challenging. I'm the type of person who is moved by music and can quickly become encouraged by listening to Christian songs. I've been directed back to songs that are blasts from the past like Harvest's "Only the Overcomers" and "Stand". If you've never heard them you can listen to them at YouTube. Some of the early contemporary Christian music was so awesome and inspiring. Perhaps a little more appreciated by me – since at one point in my life I felt like I had "lost" the joy of music forever - but that's another story.

And these songs did minister to me - some. However, the "fix" was temporary because, in the current situation I'm in, the roots are deep and the attack is strong. I'm on the front lines and the artillery is aimed right between my eyes. Of course I have prayed. During this situation, I have found that I can pray for others, but it feels like my discussions with the Lord about me have a one way ticket – to the ceiling and down. I know that isn't true, but it appears that I've got a touch of "hard-of-hearing-it is". Perhaps it is because I really don't want to hear anything about what I'm going through and only want to hear about the next step after the war.

So in the midst of the raging battle I "saw" this – not an actual vision – but I could picture this: I was standing in a glass house and I turned my head to the right and saw a myriad of people whose lives appeared enviable. I then turned my head to the left and I could see people who had major struggles going on in their lives. The message appeared to be that I didn't need to look at either of the groups. I couldn't say, "Thank God I'm not in that group – or Lord why can't I be more like the people in that group?" We aren't given the option to compare ourselves one to another. So the question remained – could I be thankful and worship God in my own house?

That's when I fell into a trap. (another – again – ugh) I thought about the wonderful little "faith-isms" we say to one another – like – "Thank God for what you are going through – when you come out on the other side you will be stronger." While that may be true – whilst you are going through the gauntlet, it is NOT a really comforting message. How about the – well let's start going through all I have to be thankful for – and I grant you that while that very often works – it too was not doing it for me at the moment. I just wasn't needing a "what you do for me" time.

Many years ago we were asked if we were interested in adopting two little boys. These children were in a bad situation and needed a home quickly. We had wanted children for so long that this seemed an answer sent by God – not one child but two and it was right around Christmas. I walked through the mall looking at toys and dreaming about what the soon coming Christmas might be like with two boys of my own. Of course we told our friends and family, and all were praying with us and for us. And then the phone call came. A distant relative of the boys said she would take the children. Within minutes my hopes and dreams were dashed to nothing. My heart felt like someone had ripped it out of my chest.

I jumped in my car to head over to a friend's house for consolation. I cried and hyperventilated all the way over to her house. When I got there – no one was home. I got back in the car, rolled the window up and screamed at the top of my lungs. Then I cried. I cried until I was worn out. And then I said this,

"Satan you may try to take everything away from me – but this you cannot take - God is still God. Jesus Christ is still my Lord. Holy Spirit still lives within me. You have not won. You will not win. If I get down to nothing else in my life – this I know to be true – Jesus Christ died for my sins and He is my Lord and Savior."

When I get down to the nitty – gritty. When I am "at the bottom of the barrel" - in my life it doesn't come down to what I have, what I've been given, what battles I've won.  The bottom line is who He is – and that NEVER changes. I was back to that point the other day and discovered (again) that I am full of thanks that God is faithful. He is who He says He is – regardless of what is going on (or not going on) in my life. My life, my works, my husband, my child, my work (or lack thereof), my possessions – or the loss of any or all of those – nothing alters the truth of God and His Word. That's what I stand on in the midst of any circumstance. Thank you God for You.

Comments

[Judith Wilkinson]

This was inspiring. Thank you for your faithfulness.
Love you, Judy

[Joel Spencer]

Well said Susan. Your resolve speaks volumes. As you said, whether all unfolds as we think it should or not, God is unchanging and all is in His hands. I take comfort in knowing you sit in the palm of His hand. Whatever comes, He allows, whether I understand it or not. K and I continue to stand with you guys and are honored and blessed to see first-hand your faith and unwillingness to waiver, no matter what comes.